#33: Skip Lackey
Lacking Everything That Makes A Good Host

Host: Think Fast (1990-1991)

Last Week on Game Show Garbage, I inducted Robb Edward Morris due to him being completely uninterested, both physically, and verbally about his show.  Now, let's take a look at the partner show of Make The Grade, Think Fast.  While Make The Grade had a good format first season, great set and good host in Lew Schneider; Think Fast was somewhat lacking in those aspects.  While the format was somewhat decent and the set was too small for what they wanted to do, at least Michael Carrington was adept enough to handle it...some of the time.  But hey, at least he kept his composure on screen and knew what was going on...some of the time.

Ok, I admit that the show some of the time was train-wreck worthy, but if that first season was a train-wreck to watch some times, then watching the 1990 episodes would be watching a natural disaster.  The set got way, way, way too big for what it needed to do, the format didn't change much but introduced more games to be played, most of them just variations that they have been doing earlier, and they got a host that was the polar opposite of Michael Carrington.  Instead of being, calmer, cooler and actually could pay attention to something for more than 5 seconds, they got a host who was way too hyper for this sort of show, sounded like he was on edge, and had to ask who won almost every single game, even when the display on the podium said who won and who didn't.  Ladies and gentlemen, Skip Lackey.

Skip, like Robb was, was an actor before he got the hosting gig for Think Fast.  But instead of being in a movie about a genetic mutated baboon, Skip starred as Jim Carrey's friend in the 1985 Vampire Comedy, Once Bitten, where he spent most of the movie wondering whether his other friend and him are gay and should sleep with each other when they should have been worrying about his friend being seduced by Lauren Hutton playing a female, sexed up version of Count Dracula horribly.  He also wrote & starred in a 1987 made for TV movie called Invasion of the Mind Benders where he played a loud obnoxious school DJ, trying to save his classmates from having their brains molded into Jell-o by some evil psychopathic doctor.  Needless to say that this movie was a total trainwreck.  From the acting, to the lighting, to the cheap, even for made for TV effect to the script was pure drek.  So, he can't act, he can't write, but could he host? 

Every episode, Skip Lackey comes out of these double doors and does a double fist pump or something to that effect.  I'm guessing he does that because he's just excited.  He always follows that up with the line, "Welcome everybody to Think Fast.  How are we all doing out there?  LET'S HEAR IT!!!!  YEAH!!!!!"  It sounds very desperate for attention and it's made worse by his mannerisms coming out of the big doors.  I think here's a good place to bring up that during one episode where he was introduced as being one hell of a dancer, he came out, banging his head, and ran to the contestants and proceeded to slap his own posterior, like he was riding the pony or something that effect.  I would have a picture to show that effect, but I haven't to track down said picture since my initial seeing of this episode 7 years ago on Nick GAS.  If that's how you make your entrance, then it's just pathetic rather than endearing or entertaining or normal for that matter.

It gets much worse when he actually starts talking to the contestants.  I mean, he shows very little personality besides just being loud.  I doubt the contestants even care about him anyways.  I'm also under the impression that he didn't care about the contestants at all, mainly by giving standard answers like "cool or awesome or terrific".  It's just hurting my brain that someone can be so hyper about a mediocre show without the use of recreational drugs or 10 gallons of Mountain Dew like other hosts.

I guess I should talk about his explaining of the events.  And boy, do we get into some serious trouble here.  He spends most of the time looking at his cards that he holds all of the time.  I'm under the assumption that without those cards, he'd be stumbling and bumbling more than Robb Edward Morris was explaining the fire drills.  Skip would spend his time reading the cards and just act stupid and whatnot.  He seems to have no clue on what to do without the help of his precious 3x5s.  I would have a soundbyte of him explaining, but I don't want to put you through that type of torture after last week. 

During the stunts, he seems to give his descriptions like he's a director, rather than that of a host.  More often than not, when the stunts don't involve him reading questions or they're not playing Paint Catcher or something to that effect, he'll call what's going on one side, then say "Let's go to the Blue Team."  Or he'll say, "Let's check out the Gold Team."  He also has problems basically explaining what's going on with the stunts.  After the stunts, he's supposed to know the results right then and there, unless it's close.  But, with him being the poster child of ADD, he more often than not has to ask the judges for the results, even if it's as plain as day.

For example, take a look at the end result from this playing of "Leaning Tower of Things."  He had to go to the judges after this end result, when it's as plain as day.  How stupid do you have to be to not see that Gold's tower is bigger than Blue's tower.  How can someone with so much energy be someone that is so lazy?

For my sanity and yours, I'm going to skip the brain bender, because that was something that he couldn't screw up.

So now we're at the locker room and while yes, it's supposed to be hectic, Skip couldn't control it.  All he said during the locker room was "FIND THE MATE, FIND THE MATE.  YES, LOCK IT UP! LOCK IT UP! LOCK IT UP! LOCK IT UP!"  I guess that's all he could do when it came to this.  Skip would always be on the point of orgasm, even when they get their first match.  Shouldn't that be saved for when they win it all?

Afterwards, Skip would awkwardly ask the contestants if they were tired, yet happy that they won all this stuff, including cash and prizes.  More often than not, he would ask the question so many times that it just became completely redundant.  He couldn't just do a clean close, congratulating the teams, asking what they were going to do with all that money?  Instead, his hyperness causes his brain to fritz and he forgets the simplest thing.  So, he'll spend some time bumbling around before giving the ending line, "When you don't have the time to think twice, then Think Fast."

After the season was over, Nickelodeon thought really fast and canned Lackey & the show entirely.  Lackey would go on to do mainly nothing for years until 2002 where he wrote, directed and acted in a German movie called Love At Second Sight.  While that movie didn't go over well anywhere, let alone not having a ranking at IMDB, he disappeared afterwards, never to be seen or heard from again...or did he? 

The crack research staff here at Game Show Garbage...well, it's just our webmaster Carl Chenier.  He has found Skip Lackey currently doing a religious themed radio show on BlogTalkRadio & selling his wares on his website.

So, Skip Lackey giving up acting & film & TV for religion?  Wow, guess there is a god after all.


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