The Inductions I Never
Text by: Cyndi Seidelman
With Game Show Garbage coming to a close, I went back through all of my files and discovered that I had worked on some stuff that I never finished or had planned on doing, but never got around to completing them, whether they were in written form or when I was doing videos before I changed it back to text form, along with some of my reasoning and how far I got.
Dale Winton's Will You Dance With Me Video: This was one of the first UK Month inductions I planned on doing. My big problem falls in two forms. One was the terrible video itself with Dale and the Bar-Codes dancing nonsensically in front of a green screen with random clips of Supermarket Sweep and a hunky guy doing some shopping. To me is the song is not good at all. They tried to make some euro-dance song and even for something like that it didn't work. The beat doesn't have the same "get up and dance" vibe as Haddaway's What Is Love did. I had planned on doing it text wise, but could never do it justice there and when I dusted it off for a video induction, that's when Article 13 came down and it was nixed.
The Hell's Kitchen All-Embarassment Team: The origins of this stem from the very beginning of the site, talking with Carl Chenier about some of the worst ever chefs on Hell's Kitchen. Another spark was when I was roasted on an Asalieri2 Reviewing a Reviewer video a couple years ago. Oddly enough, we became friends after that over our love of Hell's Kitchen and talked about some of the worst chefs. The guidelines are that they couldn't be first out, couldn't be medically eliminated and couldn't have made it to the Black Jackets. Tom was the first one and was hinted at in the Worst of Hell's Kitchen 2 video. Other chefs would have been Lacey, Lovely, Seth, Raj, Boris, half of the mens team from Season 11, among others. This was shelved after Season 2's worst of video was blocked in the USA and later Season 3's was.
Pulling A Bradford: This was going to be the April Fools 2012 induction. This is the origin of the Bradford move in reality game shows where a contestant gives up immunity for whatever reason and then gets eliminated that same day. On The Apprentice 2, a contestant named Bradford won immunity in the first week by being the Project Manager of the winning team. This was a new gimmick added to the series. In week 2, he would be part of the losing team and be on the chopping block. During the dressing down from Donald Trump to the losing team, he thought he was so bulletproof that he thought he could be put on the chopping block and survive. So, he waived his Immunity and was chastized for that move almost immediately by the Donald and his two co-horts and immediately eliminated. Because of college and personal reasons, this was shelved.
That's My Dog: While it's a Family Channel game show, this wasn't part of the planned Family Channel Arc. This was actually supposed to be part of the Karmic Revenge arc. The story would have been that I foisted the two game show porn parody inductions unto Cornshaq. After Cornshaq's dog Ein wouldn't stop barking, the show would be foisted upon me. To me, the show is terrible because of lackluster hosting and an ever changing format. The reason behind the cancellation of this was via the death of Jim Williams. I figured a video honoring him with a show both of us hated and a host to match would be something he'd have enjoyed.
Baby Races: Now this was supposed to be the last of the Family Channel Arc for July. The big thing that racked my brain was putting into words how much I hated almost everything about this show. When your announcer Gene Wood openly calls this show a disaster, you know you screwed up. My biggest problem with the show is that it kinda felt like exploitation in a way. In the ages of 2-4, kids don't normally have enough sense to do various stunts that the show had. Sometimes they'd get 5-7 year olds, but those aren't babies, making the title meaningless. It was just a worthless show that paired up nicely with That's My Dog in being trash.
Scott Sternberg - A Legacy of Failure: I'm a big fan of YouTuber UrinatingTree and of the mind that Scott Sternberg has never produced a game show that could be considered good. The format would be in Tree's Legacy of Failure style of videos, especially since he came out with one on the Seattle Mariners not soon after April 1st. This was also going to be the April Fools 2019 video. After figuring out that Game Show Gumbo was a great vehicle for the future, I decided to have that be the April Fools video. Sternberg was going to be in 2020, but I decided to shelve it entirely when I announced the end of Game Show Garbage.
Jeremy Clarkson - Game Show Host: All of this was before his fantastic hosting of the new Millionaire in the UK. This would be about his one season on Robot Wars where he didn't give a damn about what was going on or anything like that whereas Craig Charles was simply brilliant. The kicker for me was during a behind the scenes special of Season 1, Clarkson arrived and wasn't impressed with the house robots at all and seemed very standoffish about the whole thing. This was going to be the induction after Miriam, but finding that terrible Final Chase was icing on that.
I'm pretty sure I had more written down, but those are kinda lost to time and memory. Anyways I hope you enjoyed reading about some of the inductions that didn't get made. The next one will be the Top 5 Worst Things That I've Inducted. Until next time for the last time.
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