Tooncrap #22 - Little Princess School
The Three R's: Rotten, Retched, Ripoff
Video Brinquedo: 2007
Written by: Raymond Gallant
Well, it's been a while since we've talked about our
old friends the "Asylum of Animation", VIdeo Brinquedo. For those just
coming in, Video Brinquedo is a Brazilian animation company best known
for releasing mockbuster versions of hit animated movies, with terrible
animation, destestable characters, and a dash of racism to boot. Most of
the time they try to be discreet in their plagiarism. But, in this
occasion, they're just being cocky little freaks.
Take a good look at the first pic in this induction. Take a good look at
the characters, and see which ones look familiar. If you said they look
like midget versions of Cinderella, Jasmine, and Snow White, you win the
Here, take this copy of Don't Wake Daddy. The batteries are dead, and
the mechanism to make daddy wake up is broken, but hell, it's yours.
Yep, Brinquedo unabashedly ripped off the designs for Disney's
Princesses, and used them for their own DVD series "Little Princess
School", which I can only assime is pseudo ripping off Winx Club. Yeah,
that's a cartoon about a school of fairies, but you know, fairies,
princesses, it's all girly crap. God I hate being an equal opportunity
Little Princess School has actually seen a few episodes released,
similar to Brinquedo's other abomination, The Little Cars. Each
particular video contains several shorts. Each more nauseating than the
So, let's not waste any more time, and get educated on this school of
scoundrels. Let's review this thing.
We open to the shot of fair "castle construction paper" as the theme
song plays. The title card comes up, which still says "Escola de
Princesinhas". This was dubbed in English (With 4Kids VAs as is the
norm), but they didn't even have the time to fix their title card. God,
what jokes. We then get the names of our princesses.
Cindy. Not even going to try and bullshit this one, are you Brinquedo?
Bianca. AKA White. AKA SNOW White. About as much effort used to cover
this up like ol' "Cindy".
Hime. Now, most people seem to believe this is supposed to be Mulan,
despite her most likely being Japanese, and not Chinese.
Because we all know how well their track record with the Asians has been
Iria is next, who would later star in "The Frog Prince". Take a wild
guess what that ripped off.
Finally there's Zade. Which I will admit, that's a bit more creative
than coming up with Jasmy or some crap like that.
Ladies and gentlemen, our protagonists. The god damned Burger King
Our first episode is called Sleeping Beauties. You know, despite there
not being a rip off of Aurora anywhere to be seen in this crap. We kick
it off at night time in the castle, as we get some inane chatter from
our heroines, In classic Brinquedo fashion. And I swear to god, they're
all voiced by the same VA (Lisa Ortiz, AKA Amy Rose). Bianca apparently
has a rooster in their room, which crows, and gets the ire of the
Yep, and one of those teachers is the Wicked friggin' Queen, or Madam
Drastic as this schlock refers her as. And believing our heroes are up
to no good, checks in on them. But of course, sees nothing out of the
ordinary. But as she leaves, the princesses once again chatter to each
other about Bianca's rooster.
Well, that didn't come out as planned.
After farm related idocy, we cut to the next day, as out heroines bitch
about having to go to class. So, they instead decide to skip class, and
head into a magic storeroom instead. They look around at the many stupid
items, like a magic apple, and a pumpkin carriage. Get it? Cause Snow
White and Cinderella involved that stuff.
After some near vandalism, the princesses find a magic spinning wheel,
which Cindy believes is, and god help me I wish I was making this up, an
"ergometric bicycle". Yes, an ergometric bicycle with an ominous needle
on the front. A needle that the morons touch without any thought. And,
as you'd guess, it puts three of the girls to sleep. Cindy becomes
concerned that her friends are both asleep and retarded, and tries to
find out, and gets help from a magic mirr...
KILL IT WITH FIRE!
The Magic Mirror introduces itself, and Cindy instantly believes it's a
HD TV. And at this point I kinda wish Cindy got pricked with the needle
and never woke up. The mirror informs her that the only way for our
heroines to be awoken is from the kiss of a prince. Since this place is
a princess school, they've hit a snag. While she waits for the mirror to
load (what?) Lurch, the custodial elf of the school is headed to lock
the storeroom, when he's stopped by Hime. And the whole segment is as
pointless as you'd expect, telling us what we already knew. Back to
Cindy and the mirror, which crashed. Well, that's what you get for using
Vista, I guess. Hime comes in, and the two whine about Lurch possibly
locking them in. they try to get the girls out of the room before Hime,
under really no persuasion whatsoever, pricks her hand on the spinning
Little Princess School obviously doesn't teach common sense.
Lurch gets chewed out by Madam Drastic for not locking the storeroom
door, as Cindy tries to find a way to save her friends. She too runs
into Drastic, and bullshits her way out of trouble. Cindy decides to go
into their room and grab Bianca's rooster (still not sounding right).
And with the help of a little deus-ex rooster box, the girls are
awakened, and leave the store room without getting in any trouble
whatsoever. The end.
And that's Little Princess School. Good God what a piece of... Wait,
there's another episode on this video? Dammit to hell. Let's review that
Our 2nd tale is "The Enchanted Toad". We begin with our heroines
engaging in morning calisthenics, which is stopped by Cindy complaining
about breaking a nail. I wish that was a joke. After that, it's more
inane chatter, as the airheads forgot to bring something called a
mandragorem root to Madam Drastic's class for the next day after the
olympics (Special I take it). So, our heroines head to the forest to
find one, while Iria runs into a toad.
The toad tells her that he can find some of that root for her, if he
gets a kiss in return. This repulses Iria, and raises the interest of
Chris Hansen. She gives in, and kisses our amphibian antagonist.
Which works as well as you'd guess.
In order to aid the now warty moron, they run into a witch who promises
to help them if they aid her ugliness problem. With the aid of the toad,
they find the root they were looking for, and with the use of a magic
book, and some other BS, are able to turn her back to normal. However,
now she can jump better because she was a toad, or some stupid crap,
which helps her win their Olympics. Madam Drastic wants answers, and
again, they bullshit their way out of trouble. She finds the toad, and
he gives her a lot of B.S in order to get her to kiss him. Which she
does, turning him into a giant toad-man-thing.
And the girls laugh at the thought of her being raped by a giant toad
thing, because, you know, she toadally deserved it. The End.
Sadly, there's one more short left, "Defenseless Princes", which I
really don't want to put in the effort with since it's just as inane as
the first two. We open again with the princesses daily exercise, their
coach telling them that, and I quote:
"A princess has to be in great shape if she wants to do high stress
"How do I hate this company, let me tell the ways"
They chatter inanely for a while, until Bianca starts talking to a
squirrel. The others, being the bitches they are, believe she's
conspiring against them to pull animal related pranks. But that's not
the case as apparently there's a monster or something at a school for
princes. So, the next several minutes are filled with inane, sexist
chatter, and plans to shirk whatever education they're supposed to get,
so they can disobey orders, and then BS Madam Drastic later. Because
Madam Drastic's supposed to be the villain apparently. The girls lie to
her, and treat education like nothing because they're a bunch of spoiled
brats, but she's the villain.
She's the Ed Rooney to their 5 Ferris Buellers.
I'll save you the trouble with this one. Nothing happens. Even less than
the last two. They chatter, they act like snarky douches, run into a
monster for a couple seconds, head back to the school, and get away with
leaving the school grounds. The FRIGGIN' END!
And that's Little Princess School. Unlikable characters, bad animation,
inane plots, and a waste of mildly tolerable voice actors. pretty much
runs the gamut of our old pals Video Brinquedo But even for Brinquedo
characters, these 5 are perhaps the worst yet. No defining
characteristics whatsoever. All are airheaded, lying, uneducated,
fashion obsessed dolts who are supposed to be our protagonists. What a
load of crap. One could argue that yes, this is aimed for very little
girls. But this really isn't worth giving to an infant, much less a
little girl. This is despicable Tooncrap. But for our old Brazilian
buddies, it's pretty much par for the course.